My 1st Pick Barometer

(Adrian Peterson)

I've seen multiple people try and get fancy with the first pick. They try to make a fashion statement like Lukas and his cream orange Buccaneers hat, but like the hat they never really pan out like you planned.  That's why I'm leaning heavily towards Adrian Peterson. He was #3 in the NFL Top 100 poll, he gets goal line carries, he catches the ball, he might as well take Hurst's job too and drive the bus while he is at it.

I'd sleep a lot easier with my pick if the Vikes acquired a veteran quarterback like McNabb or even an Orton. Who we kidding though All-Day Peterson has been running against a stacked box his whole career.

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(Arian Foster)

It's tearing me apart that I can't just pick this guy up out of free agency this year. Everyone knows the deal with Arian. There are two questions that everyones asking. Can he do it again? and What is last years first round pick Ben Tate going to do?

 He's on an awesome team that everyone likes to watch, he catches the ball, he gets all the goal line carries, and he does that cool bow when he scores too. (:12 seconds you hear the infamous "stand up and take a bow"

            

I want to make sweet fantasy love to you, but are you teasing me?


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(Jamaal Charles)

He's like the cute girl at school that dated some tool the year before, but dumped him so now everyone one wants her. However, in the long run she doesn't really put out, and rarely scores. She usually gets too drunk and hands the ball off to one of her friends to finish the job; i.e Thomas Jones. We'll see how Jamaal looks on draft night, maybe he wears that nice sun dress, and maybe I pull the trigger and go sexy with my pick.

An injury to Thomas Jones in pre-season could make this pick very interesting though.

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Maurice Jones-Drew
I had the #1 overall pick a couple years ago as well, so I picked MJD aka The Cat's Pajamas. The man hosts his own fantasy show, so I know every game he is playing for me too, and not just the Jags (except when he takes a knee on the 1). The only thing that sucks about drafting MJD is that you have to follow the Jaguars all year (Ask Powers he knows my pain). MJD is one of those players who will get you a consistent 10+ points a week because of his ability to catch the ball, and the fact that the Jags will give the ball to him 3 straight, sometimes even 4 straight, on the 1 yard line.

I'd rock the Cat's Pajamas if I got a Retweet from him on Twitter

<-----------------------5ish-------------------------------->

(Madison Hedgecock)

Good ol' MadCock I picked him last year as a joke because I knew I was going to drop him the next day and pick up one of the hundreds of free-agents. The guy who replaced MadCock on my team last year was none other than Arian "take a bow" Foster. Maybe this guy is just lucky, and maybe I hit the lottery twice. 

"So you're telling me there's a chance"

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Muddled Memories: The Evolution of the League

Today we look back at those changes that have shaped the league into what it is today. There have been some minor rule changes and some owners that have come and gone, which have all altered the league that we see today.

The first change that jumps out is the Draft date. Let me tell you a little story about a kid that got to pick his favorite player, from his favorite team, with his high first-round pick. Sounds like a fairy tale, right? It would be, if that innocent little boy didn’t have a tuna can and didn’t pick a player who abruptly retired to rip bongs in a tent with Lenny Kravitz. After Gill’s awesome mistake of relying on Dolphins and Ricky Williams, the draft had to be pushed back.

The next rule that had to be amended was the “kick returners score a billion points” rule. The commish threw a little curve ball into the mix when he started giving out points for kick return yards. This would have been cute if anyone read the rules and realized this before John snatched up every receiver who returned kicks. The rule was quickly changed as John started rolling through week 1 with the likes of Dante Hall, Michael Lewis some other receivers you never cared about. While the timing of the rule change is still being challenged, to this day, the rule needed to be changed. (On a side note, the Dolphins thought the NFL gave out points for kick return yards when they drafted Ted Ginn, Jr.)

The Defensive Player. The defensive player was a fixture of the league for years, even having as many as 3 in some seasons. I understand that the defensive players in the NFL wanted to feel cool and get included in Fantasy Football, but nothing is worse than losing a game by a point cause Patrick Willis had more tackles than your linebacker. Gone too are the days when you can find that loophole player like an early Devin Hester, who was listed as a DP and clearly played offense.

A Relegation system of sorts, through the years we have trimmed some of the fat in the league. While we sure miss the “Battle of the Slopes,” rivalry game for the illustrious “Golden Lift Ticket” between Terrono and O’Dwyer, we can all agree that it’s for the best. No longer do we have Kropp drafting Mike Nugent in the second round or Carl and Matty sharing a team. Change is good, and the addition of newcomer Timmy is like Mark Cuban being allowed to buy the Mets or Dodgers.

Possibly the biggest evolution of the league was not through actual rule changes, but more through the owners’ evolution. I’m not about to make a touching commentary on how we have matured and evolved, just that shit has changed because we got older. These two changes have made the league the super-competitive event that it is today. The first is McCanns Sundays. Where else can we all gather, get drunk and talk shit all day. The league has gotten more competitive because there is something extra-satisfying about beating someone and watching part of their soul get crushed right in front of you. The second is having jobs. Jobs suck, but they have given us time to research even more and make a blog. Our anticipation for this season is higher than ever before, and it’s not the lockout. It’s the realization that McCanns Sundays and Fantasy Football make us different than the loser at the desk next to you. We are better than those fools, partly because of our fantasy superiority.

Coffin Corner: 2010 Top 10 Fantasy Performances on the Bench

In this edition of the Coffin Corner we take a look at the biggest fantasy games from players who were left riding the Pine Pony instead of the starting lineup and the ripple effect of the mistake. Every year there are monster games left on the bench, such as Ronnie Brown’s 5 Touchdown performance against the Patriots when the Wildcat was unveiled. These games are big because a huge game left on the bench might be the difference between a win and a loss, or might be the difference in a tiebreaking scenario in the playoffs. I didn’t include a player if they scored a ton of points, but were outperformed by the starter, such as if Mike’s backup QB had 50 points the week Vick had 57 points.

10. Matt Ryan – (Week 7) 30.46 Points

Matt Ryan threw for 300 yards and 3 TDs against the Bengals in Week 7. Kevin lost this game to Hurst by less than 2 points, so the difference in points between Matt Ryan and Kyle Orton would have been enough for Kevin to win. This would have dropped Hurst from 8-5 to 7-4 and he would have had the 5 seed rather than the 4 seed, meaning that his first round game would have been on the road instead of at home against Jimmy… okay, so basically nothing significant would have changed.

9. Matt Forte – (Week 5) 31.8 Points

Forte had almost 200 all-purpose yards and 2 TDs against the Panthers in week 5, but Nick had given Peyton Hillis the nod in the starting lineup this week. Nick had gotten Kevin on an off week and stuck it to him beating him by almost 60 points, so the additional points would have done nothing other than embarrass our league commissioner a little bit more. No effect on the standings occurred because of these missed points.

8. Peyton Hillis – (Week 9) 33.5 Points

The New England Patriots basically rolled through most of the regular season, minus a few speed bumps. The Cleveland Browns were one of those speed bumps. Hillis had 220 all purpose yards and 2 TDs, but Nick has started Matt Forte over Hillis this week (basically the exact opposite of Week 5). Nick was lucky that the rest of his team had a great day and that Joey couldn’t keep up with him, even with Hillis on the bench. The points didn’t have a bearing on the tiebreakers, so Nick wasn’t punished for missing the extra points.

7. Keiland Williams – (Week 10) 33.9 Points

Sometimes it’s nice to have running backs from the same team when they use a running back by committee, but when you start the running back that has 0 points and you bench the back that has 3 TDs and 140 yards you tend to regret it. That is exactly what happened to Brendan “the Fresh Prince” Feifer (thank god for that memory at Stump the Schwab). Luckily for Feifer he cock-slapped John by 50 points, but the extra 33 would have nice to embarrass Johnny Boy. These points had no bearing on the playoff seeding. 

6. Jay Cutler – (Week 12) 35.58 Points

Not many people can say they truly believed that Jay “Redzone Interception” Cutler would throw for 250 yards and 4 TDs against the Eagles, so it’s hard to fault Mike for giving Vick the start. Mike ended up pulling off a 2 points squeaker over Hurst, so had he started Cutler he may have saved himself a little bit of stress, but nonetheless, these extra points didn’t hurt Mike on the bench.

5. Kyle Orton – (Week 10) 35.74 Points

Kyle Orton had a huge day this week, throwing for nearly 300 yards and 4 TDs against the Chiefs. This would not have had too much of an effect on the season since Kevin would have still won this game and just outscored everybody else by a few more points at the end of the year. Luckily for me, Orton threw a few TDs to Brandon Lloyd during this game, so I’ll just thank you Kevin for helping me win this week.

4. Darren McFadden – (Week 14) 40.4 Points

This was the second time of the season that Darren McFadden punished me for not starting him. It felt like every time I turned my head to the Oakland game, DMC was making his way into the end zone, and my hopes of beating Kevin in the playoffs were dying. Little did I know McFadden was just giving us all a wonderful gift in the form of the greatest Fantasy Football finish of all time. Had I started McFadden, I would have blown Kevin out of the water and advanced to the semis with ease, but instead I was forced to rely on Matt Schaub and Neil Rackers to basically outscore the dynamic duo of Adrian Peterson and Arian Foster with their trusty sidekick Derrick Mason. This is a tall task for anyone, but Schaub and Rackers proved worthy and helped carry me to a win in true David vs. Goliath fashion.

3. Matt Cassel – (Week 10) 41.06 Points

Matt Cassel was a late season pick up during this week and showed me that I should not have hesitated to put him into the starting lineup. Cassel threw for 469 yards and had 4 TDs, which showed me that he probably deserved to start down the stretch, especially with the chemistry he and Dwayne Bowe had been building. These points left on the bench would have put me into 7^th place over John and would have gotten me eliminated in the first round instead of the semi finals. John would have lost to Jimmy in the semis after beating Kevin.

2. Kenny Britt - (Week 7) 44 Points

Kenny Britt exploded this week with 225 Receiving yards and 3 TDs and it really hurt John because Mike Thomas had -2 points and Wes Welker had 4.5 points. Had Britt been placed in the lineup for either one of them, John would have beaten Mike and had the 6^th seed in the playoffs. Nick would have fallen to 7^th, but it didn’t matter too much, since both Nick and John would have still been eliminated in the first round of the playoffs.

1. Darren McFadden – (Week 7) 44.6 Points

This was Darren McFadden’s break out performance this year. McFadden looked like a man possessed against the Broncos, scoring 4 TDs on 196 all-purpose yards. Although I won the game, McFadden would have replaced Rashard Mendenhall who only got 4.6 Points this week, giving me 40 more points on the year, which would have made me the 7 seed and John the 8 seed for the playoffs due to the tiebreaker. Assuming the same playoff point totals, I would have lost to Mike in the first round of the playoffs, John would have beaten Kevin in the first round and then would have lost to Jimmy, thus keeping the end result of the season the same.

Editor’s note: As I was putting this together, I thought more of these games would have been effected by the points on the bench, but for the most part it really had no bearing on the final outcome of the league.

Introducing....Fangs and Rollerblades

Fangs and Rollerblades is the team managed by Kevin.

Toilet Time

Big Board: Football

By Brandon Funston, Yahoo! SportsJun 17, 5:18 pm EDT

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Big Boards: Football | Baseball | Basketball | Hockey

The Big Board takes into consideration past returns, current performance and expected future gains in determining who should be included among the top 50 fantasy football players. Essentially, the Big Board is a cheat sheet designed for a fantasy owner who is planning to participate in a draft today. Yahoo! Sports Fantasy Football default scoring settings are used as the baseline for the Big Board, which is updated on a regular basis.

Big Board 50: Football
Rank	Player	Stock	Pvs.
1	Arian Foster(notes), Hou, RB	Dream for Kubiak’s scheme: Versatile, durable workhorse	–
2	Adrian Peterson, Min, RB	Carries large burden as Favre is gone, OL no longer dominant	–
3	Chris Johnson, Ten, RB	Has at least 1,488 YFS and 10+ TDs in each of his 3 seasons	–
4	Jamaal Charles(notes), KC, RB	Near carbon copy of C. Johnson, and may be in a better situation	–
5	Maurice Jones-Drew(notes),Jac,RB	Had 6-game streak of 100+ rush yards before Week 15 injury	–
6	Aaron Rodgers(notes), GB, QB	Has been top 2 in fantasy scoring each of 3 seasons as starter	–
7	Michael Turner(notes), Atl, RB	Dynamic ATL offense should provide tons of goal-line work	–
8	LeSean McCoy(notes), Phi, RB	No. 6 among RBs in FAN PPG in ’10	–
9	Rashard Mendenhall(notes),Pit,RB	Including postseason, scored 8 TDs in final 6 games of ’10	–
10	Ray Rice(notes), Bal, RB	6 TDs were a disappointment, but was 3rd in YFS (1,776)	–
11	Andre Johnson(notes), Hou, WR	Top 3 in FAN PPG at WR in each of past 4 seasons	–
12	Michael Vick(notes), Phi, QB	No. 1 in FAn PPG in ’10, but style is durability concern	–
13	Darren McFadden(notes), Oak, RB	YFS machine finished behind only Foster in FAN PPG at RB in ’10	–
14	Roddy White(notes), Atl, WR	Had 22 more catches than any other player, save R. Wayne, in ’10	–
15	Calvin Johnson(notes), Det, WR	Perhaps most talented WR in NFL, but never more than 78 receptions	–
16	Drew Brees(notes), NO, QB	Top 3 QB in each of his 5 seasons in New Orleans	–
17	Peyton Manning(notes), Ind, QB	Neck surgery not to be ignored, but still virtual QB top 5 lock	–
18	Frank Gore(notes), SF, RB	Versatile warrior, but now have to accept DNPs come w/ the deal	–
19	Hakeem Nicks(notes), NYG, WR	Tied w/ B. Lloyd for most FAN PPG at WR in ’10	–
20	Philip Rivers(notes), SD, QB	Impressive top 4 QB finish in ’10 given revolving door at WR	–
21	Larry Fitzgerald(notes), Ari, WR	90 catches, 1,137 yards in worst of times—’11 should be better	–
22	Steven Jackson, StL, RB	He’s a beast, but with high mileage and consistently low TD marks	–
23	Peyton Hillis(notes), Cle, RB	Ram-Man hit wall in ’10 stretch, but he’s earned 300-touch encore	–
24	Shonn Greene(notes), NYJ, RB	Jets are handing him the featured role … finally!	–
25	Reggie Wayne(notes), Ind, WR	Feels like he’s slowing, but 111 rec, 1,355 yds suggest otherwise	–
26	Ahmad Bradshaw(notes), NYG, RB	Diminutive Giant best suited as a platoon leader and not a solo act	–
27	Matt Forte(notes), Chi, RB	Elite receiving RB, & 4.5 YPC behind ho-hum OL in ’10 commendable	–
28	Brandon Marshall(notes), Mia, WR	TDs were down in Year 1 in MIA, but still solid 100-catch bet	–
29	Greg Jennings(notes), GB, WR	Returned to elite class, but Finley’s return could curb ’11 follow-up	–
30	Dwayne Bowe(notes), KC, WR	For a 7-week span (Week 6-12), he was in WR class of his own	–
31	DeSean Jackson(notes), Phi, WR	Best bet @ WR to take it the distance on any given play	–
32	Antonio Gates(notes), SD, TE	Leg injuries cut into PT in ’10, but he blew away TE class in FAN PPG	–
33	LeGarrette Blount(notes), TB, RB	Averaged 89 rushing yards, 5+ YPC in final 11 games of ’10	–
34	Tom Brady(notes), NE, QB	Rock steady, but lacks a true field-stretching weapon	–
35	Tony Romo(notes), Dal, QB	On pace for roughly 4,200 pass yds, 27 TDs before clavicle injury	–
36	Ryan Mathews(notes), SD, RB	Durability will go a long ways given talent and explosive offensive	–
37	Mike Williams, TB, WR	Naturally-gifted WR developed instant rapport with QB Freeman	–
38	Mike Wallace(notes), Pit, WR	Premier deep threat is AFC’s version of DeSean Jackson	–
39	Miles Austin(notes), Dal, WR	3 best catches/yards games came in the 6 full games w/ Romo	–
40	Vincent Jackson(notes), SD, WR	Could take off if he can improve possession/go-to skills	–
41	Matt Ryan(notes), Atl, QB	ATL treated Ryan very well in April’s NFL Draft	–
42	Jermichael Finley(notes), GB, TE	Past 16 games (including playoffs): 81 catches, 1,130 yards, 6 TDs	–
43	Marques Colston(notes), NO, WR	Already back to full strength following offseason knee surgery	–
44	Jonathan Stewart(notes), Car, RB	Avg. 1,000+ YFS, 8 TDs, 4.7 YPC in 3 seasons as backup	–
45	DeAngelo Williams(notes), Car, RB	Free agent is too talented not to land in high-usage situation	–
46	Dez Bryant(notes), Dal, WR	An off-field train wreck, but he’s a thing of beauty on it	–
47	Dallas Clark(notes), Ind, TE	Clocked in among top 3 TEs in FAN PPG in each of past 3 seasons	–
48	Matt Schaub(notes), Hou, QB	Finally delivered (#2 fantasy QB) like expected in final 5 weeks of ’10	–
49	Ben Roethlisberger(notes), Pit, QB	In suspension-shortened ’10, was 7th among QBs in FAN PPG	–
50	Marshawn Lynch(notes), Sea, RB	W/ Tom Cable & OL additions, expect much-improved SEA run game